Hallo, willkommen

This blog is a personal record of the life of a chronically ill (chronically awesome), disabled, dyslexic, doctoral student and entrepreneur.

I share the beautiful moments, and the hard ones. It's unfiltered, and extremely uncensored.


Work Flow, and Science Communication

Work Flow, and Science Communication

Tuesdays and Thursdays are exhausting days. I'm at my office all day: seeing clients, doing paperwork and consult follow ups, helping the chiropractor that I rent my space from with his medical reports and insurance billing, and sharing half my space with an acupuncturist who has very specific standards for noise, temperature, and smell (which is understandable, but a little tiresome none the less). Sometimes on Tuesdays I end up running errands/making deliveries on my lunch break/after hours. I get up early and reply to emails, and when I get home I work through dinner and late into the night.

I've been in the process of putting together the Advisory Board for my program for about a month, which has been an oddly challenging job. Finding folks who have insight into the field as well as the target demographics, but who are also solid people with good morals and ethics, and who have at least half a head for business, AND who are willing to donate their time on a regular basis to advise me on a totally badass program (I'm biased, but I'm still right).

Additionally, today I formally landed a new wholesale account, which I mentioned a few posts ago. Yay! I'm trying to figure out what the hell is going on with our businesses t-shirts, which should be hot off the screen-printing presses soon, get a whole new booking, class scheduling, and employee management software and POS service up and running, start this month's article for Modern Athletic Health Magazine (for which I write every month), and organize and launch RFM's new community yoga program. I also had some homework to do. Always homework.

By 1730 I was beginning to feel burned out, stressed out, and frustrated. I had to run up to Pawcatuck to deliver a payment (a custom tea blend) to my editor, dear friend, and fellow woman in STEM. I stopped by her house, and she invited me in. We ended up sitting on the floor of her 19th century walk-up apartment, playing with her cat and venting about climate change deniers, Trump (need I say more?), white people complaining about white people but not doing any outreach to marginalized communities, the importance of kind and clear science communication,  and the struggles of working with/in proximity to misogynistic males.

And, to be honest, I needed that time to vent. I have a few colleagues who continue to treat me like their secretary, despite my not working for them, and being at least equally accomplished and qualified. Being from the South, I have several family members and acquaintances who are very conservative, and since the Paris Agreement debacle, my news feeds have been flooded with religious fanatics posting capitalistic, climate change-denying  nonsense. (I've yet to decide whether to scream or cry about all that).

The continual denial of scientific facts based on religious affiliation, political persuasion, fear, or ignorance is something I ponder daily. What is to be done? How do we break through to those with deep-rooted, strongly held, unscientific beliefs? As Charlotte and I continue to conclude (we have had this conversation at least 100 times), the answer is "kind, clear, consistent education." It's tough, though, to remain humble, calm, and rational in the face of loud, angry, irrationality. As someone I greatly admire once told me, and I will paraphrase here, "it's a constant struggle between continuing my research, and shaking my fists and shouting at the sky." 
Ah, yes. As the kids say, "the struggle is real."

I'm not sure if it's human nature, or if it's just me, but these things are disturbing. They bother me to my core. Deeply. Viscerally. The fact that, for lack of information, or due to a political or religious belief, or because of misguided fear, we could damn the whole world to hell with poor environmental choices, or that we could deny safety and equality to marginalized demographics, or that we would choose to sacrifice the wellbeing of others for our own financial benefit... It breaks my heart and boggles my mind. I feel simultaneously empowered and emboldened to affect change, and to continue to educate and love everyone I encounter, and also the ever-encroaching dark desire to just give up, and hope those who are stronger, better, who have a louder voice and a longer reach than I, can accomplish what I could not.

Anxiety, Depression, and Internet Communication

Anxiety, Depression, and Internet Communication

The Side Unseen - Chronic Pain in Badass People

The Side Unseen - Chronic Pain in Badass People